


Mihawk's pain and (teddy)bears

by Arzani



Category: One Piece
Genre: Chapter 747, Gen, after two years break, based on chapter 747, based on cover page, past time skip, two years break
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-12
Updated: 2015-11-12
Packaged: 2018-05-01 08:28:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5199062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arzani/pseuds/Arzani
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mihawk never thought it would bother him when Perona and Zoro leave after the two years are over. But the time alone showed him how mistaken a man can be. Because the silence is too loud and the castle is too empty. He wonders what Perona is doing and when he sees her again, he finds out that rage is a feeling he had long forgotten.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mihawk's pain and (teddy)bears

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Mihawk's Pain and (Teddy)bears](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/155009) by Arzani92. 



> A One-Shot based on the cover of chapter 747, where Perona and Mihawk can be seen with the bear cubs.  
> Betaed by the wonderful Aerle. It's a translation of one of my own german stories. The original can be found under: http://www.fanfiktion.de/s/5380c8cc0002374731b8fde8/1/Mihawk-039-s-Pain-and-Teddy-Bears

Mihawk sat himself down onto a fallen tree trunk and crossed his arms in front of him, annoyed. The edges of the tall, elegant man's mouth twitched for minutes now and he couldn't stop asking himself what he was actually doing here. When he recognized soft bear cub's paws clawing at his side, to get on his shoulder, he was at the end of his patience. A loud sigh escaped his mouth and the only reaction he could give to so much – at least for his standards – unnaturalness was a blatant roll of his eyes.

He could hear a squeaked growl, which didn't even come close to its fearful grown-up counterpart. Even though the bear cubs played directly in front of him, there was no sign of their mother. Not that Mihawk wouldn't have noticed any attack before it actually could have come. For him, Haki wasn't a loanword, it was essential for survival. But now he realized that the bear cubs weren't only playing, but one was on his shoulders, too and – what made the whole situation worse  it had stolen his precious hat.

Automatically, the edges of his mouth fell downwards even more, and a small snarl escaped his lips. It was less the reason of the mischievous bear, but more the image of how silly he must look at the moment. Mihawk was happy that no one was able to see him, to have a reason to tease him for years from now on. With that thought a face crossed his mind, framed by red hair, and he was happy, as well, that there was no photo taken, because if there would exist one, he was sure, Shanks would get it into his hands. This was something Mihawk definitely didn't want to happen. No single person of the Grandline would ever take him serious again. Not to mention the marines, even though he didn't care much for them, as long as they accepted him as a warlord and granted him his peace and quiet.

On top of it there was the look he felt staring into his back. Not that it was uncomfortable, he got used to it long ago. But it hindered him from grabbing the bear cubs and throwing them into a corner, where they primarily couldn't reach his hat. Such balls of fur didn't need one, after all and if they did, they shouldn't take the famous Hawk-Eye's one.

Annoyed, he sighed again and could see in front of his mind’s eye how Perona gazed at him right now. He knew with certainty that the young woman, with her black and white dress, half afloat over the ground, a finger at her lips, wasn't able to look away from the bear on his shoulder. He just knew it, even though he couldn't see her. He guessed her features where a mixture out of astonishment, envy and curiosity. A brief look behind his back confirmed his assumption.

He could feel the bear move on his shoulders, again. It circled to find a comfortable position and clawed his skin in a more or less painful way. It didn't really bother him, it only was annoying. If it hadn't been for Perona, he would have sought shelter in his castle to prevent the animals from jumping on top of him. Moreover, he had the opinion that bears should be used as bedside carpets at best. They were loud, wild and barbaric, no matter how old or  _cute_ they were supposed to be.

Nonetheless, he still could hear the voice of the woman behind him ring in his ears, as she said in an instant, “Oh, look, how cute”, when they first spotted the bear cubs. Her tone, when he stated his resentment, had told him clearly that he should not dare to even touch them. It didn't even surprise the swordsman. Perona loved wild animals. In her opinion, they were “such a great zombie alternative” and “so cute”. Sometimes he wondered why she didn't just have a liking for stuffed animals… Well, okay, she had that, too.

However, when she spoke, he had dropped his sword and put it back on his back. As a result of it, he became the bear's play area.

Mihawk shook his head lightly, without risking that his obnoxious guest could fall down his shoulder and turned around to Perona. Her eyes sparkled questioningly when he regarded her. She didn't looked at him for long, though, because her gaze wandered back to the bears longingly. While the one on his shoulders finally had been able to find a comfortable position, the other lumbered to Perona, unsuspecting. She put her umbrella down, glee in her eyes.

The umbrella had been a birthday present, after she had started telling him three months in prior what she wanted from him. Her ideas reached from harmless poisonous snakes to carnivorous plants in a pot. Unfortunately, he hadn't found either one on the black market. He would have preferred it to her suggestion to buy her cloths. He didn't want to know the true consequence of presenting the dainty woman with stuff she didn't like. He liked to have his head on top of his neck, still, and he would prefer to keep it there a while longer. The idea for the umbrella, though, had come from Zoro, surprisingly, after Perona muttered about one of the sudden downpours on Kuraigana again.

The whole thing had happened around nine months ago. On Perona's birthday, none of them had wanted to think about Zoro's leaving to go back to his crew, yet. Most of the two years his captain had asked them to wait had been over. Mihawk never considered that he would care what would happen after. But the time alone proved him wrong. He bit his lip. Actually, he didn't want to think about it.

* * *

“ _The two years are nearly over, Rorona.”_

_Mihawk sat in his armchair, as usual, the newspaper open on his lap. A few seconds ago, he had been reading, but his gaze had crossed the calendar at the wall and reminded him which day was today. In about two months, Zoro would need to leave to reach Sabaody Archipelago in time._

_He_ _twirled the wineglass Mihawk held in his hand, and the scent of the wine reached his nose. It was a filigree one, made from the best grapes he had in his basement_ _. It was an expensive vintage, dark and full-bodied, thus exactly how Mihawk wanted it to be._

_His gaze remained on his pupil, who polished his beloved katanas in concentration. They had looked a bit ragged after their fight that afternoon. But they were noble swords and wouldn't dull fast. They were good blades, Mihawk knew it._

_By now, he and Zoro could spar properly. It was no comparison to the beginning of their training, when all what kept other man alive was his sheer will. Now the will was saturated with skill, strength and capability, as well. Yes, those two years made the straw-hat pirate outgrow himself, and a small spark of pride that this was his doing burned in his chest as well. Not that he ever would admit it, but he knew himself well enough to know._

_Even though Zoro hadn't had the skill to beat him now, Mihawk knew he had to hand over his title as world's greatest swordsman in the near future. He looked forward to the day when Zoro would challenge him with the sole purpose to beat him. Zoro_ _would be the only one in this world who could do it without losing his head. By now, Mihawk could slightly understand what drove Shanks to give his arm to the new era. A small part of_ _that era sat here, in front of him, and sharpened the swords that would kill him._

_Alerted by the words, Zoro looked at the other swordsman. He blinked once with his still intact eye, before he exhaled in one silent breath. Mihawk could feel the tension in the younger man. It was nearly concrete. Of course Zoro knew he had to leave soon. He awaited it, each passing day made him more nervous. He longed for his crew, his family and even though he tried to not show it, it couldn't be hidden._

“ _How long does it take from here to Sabaody Archipelago?”_

“ _Four to five days, if the wind is fortunate… and if one doesn't get lost,” Mihawk mused with a hardly visible smirk. His eyes gleamed in the light._

_He had been able to teach Zoro a lot, beyond question, but he failed miserably at his sense of orientation. Even after two years at his castle, Zoro managed to get lost in those several hallways. Without the help of Perona's many hollows the rascal would have gone_ _missing now and then. Luckily, they found him every time. By now, it seemed to Mihawk that the ghost girl created a sixth sense where Zoro was when he got lost._

_Right on cue, the pink head of hair was visible through the wall and floated towards the two men. Her look was determined, and her expression didn't show any emotion._

“ _He won't get lost, because I will join him.”_

_Mihawk didn't know if he should be impressed by the words or not. He always had the feeling that the woman only had been staying because of Zoro, and still another feeling militated against this theory of his. Her words, though, seemed to confirm the first._

_While the ghost woman and the swordsman broke into a discussion about the necessity of Perona joining him, Mihawk stopped listening. First of all, because such kind of argument between the two of them became kind of standard, and secondly, because he knew Perona would get what she wanted. She always got what she wanted, even though he had no idea how she did it. Must be something only woman could master._

_Meanwhile, his thoughts started to drift. He wondered what his female guest would do, after she had helped Zoro get back to his crew. The intentions of the Straw-Hat always had been clear. He never made a secret out of it that his only reasons for staying and training under him were because he wanted to surpass him one day. He wanted to keep the promise he made to a childhood friend and to his captain, and the Shichibukai respected this promise. It showed him that Zoro wasn't acting out of selfishness or egomania, but out of his own will to do something for others. If it had been different, Mihawk would have killed him back in East Blue._

_But Perona never had a cogent reason to stay after she landed on his island. Sure, she had stated often enough how necessary her presence was, because everything would be ruined without her. It was an exorbitant exaggeration, Mihawk had been living on this island long enough on his own to know, though. But he got used to the behavior of the girl. She didn't meant any harm by it, he was well aware of that. Only for it to be her reason to stay was something he didn't believe. Again, he wondered if she had been staying because of Zoro, but something inside of him forbade to extend this theory. He had no idea why, but whatever it was, it bothered the proud man._

_He frowned briefly, before he put his glass at his lips to take a sip. The dry red wine went down his throat, and he tasted a lingeringaftertaste. Then he looked openly at the ghost girl._

“ _Where are you going afterwards?”_

_There was silence for a short moment, and in her eyes glinted an elusive expression. But it was replaced by a mischievous smirk and she mused, “Will you miss me?”_

“ _Not really, no.” His dull features returned back to his newspaper, but not before the edges of his lips darted up slightly. “The silence will be wonderful.”_

_He could see out of the corner of his eyes that Perona stuck out her tongue at him. In the next moment, her face was not an inch in front of his and he still had the newspaper in his hand. The ghost girl just pushed her head through it. Everyone else would have been jerked, but Mihawk knew this woman and her devil's fruit powers after those two years too well to do so. Besides, he still was the legendary Hawk-Eye's. He wasn't scared, period._

“ _I'm going to look for Master Moria, though, if you want to know.”_

_Her black orbs hit his yellow one's, and he could see a mix out of provocation and anger in them. He wondered briefly if she wanted to challenge him into doing something, for instance to invite her to stay, but Mihawk shrugged it off. She wouldn't want that. He should have known that she would go back to Moria._

_When he showed no reaction to her behavior, she went as she came, through the wall. Her body certainly still remained in her room, because she had been too lazy to stand up._

_Actually, Mihawk wanted to go back reading his newspaper by now, but a questioning look out of Zoro's eyes hindered him from doing so. Again, he put the paper in his lap._

“ _You'll kick her out?”_

“ _No, but she made clear that she has no intention to stay.”_

_Since the younger swordsman didn't respond to his words, Mihawk focused his attention back to the newspaper, to finally finish the article. But while the letters started to blur, and his thoughts projected Perona's challenging look in front of his mind’s eye, words cut of his concentration again. A buzzing noise told him that Zoro had sheathed his swords._

“ _You could have offered it to her.”_

_Even though Mihawk didn't show it, the words impressed him. It was one of these incomprehensible skills of the Straw-Hat to say exactly the right thing when one would the least expect it. There had been a few situations in which it had happened, and each time it threw him off course. So this time, as well._

_He gulped, his newspaper still in front of his face, to hide his thoughtful expression. Only when he picked up his courage again he let it fall back down, and looked into those green eyes._

“ _I hold nobody here who doesn't want to be here. Not you. Not her. I only hope Gecko Moria is treating her right. If not, he's dead.”_

 

_**4 months later** _

_The chink, when he put down his wineglass, sounded loud through the otherwise quiet hall. The reverberation was increased by the emptiness and width of the room, and sounded louder than it actually was. Mihawk turned a page of his newspaper, annoyed, but the rustling of the paper was disturbing in his ears and made him even more aware of the silence. Scowling, he scrunched the newspaper into a ball, even though he hadn't finished reading the article. He sent it flying to a corner of the room where it hit the empty floor ruggedly. Meanwhile, his annoyed look out of hawk-like eyes wandered over the walls and got stuck – again – at the calendar._

_For a short moment, there was emptiness in his chest. Perona and Zoro had left three months ago. They had gone ahead of time, because Zoro didn't want to be late on any account. upon top of that, the weather had been volatile and forced them to leave early, as well._

_Three months in which the stillness in his castle had become an unbearable buzzing. He had become so used to his two guest that their absence seemed foreign and false. It was too quiet… The boisterous fussing of the pink haired girl and the annoyed replies of the pirate hunter were missing. He missed the endless discussions of Perona and Zoro._

_Though, Mihawk had been so happy to get back his peace. The first few weeks of stillness had been like heaven. No one who annoyed him while reading his newspaper, no one who scolded him that wine wasn't good for him and no one who told him his training was murderous. But by the time Perona could have been back, he became agitated. The silence he had longed for started to turn louder and louder, and by now, he couldn't stand it anymore. It ate up his self-composure._

_He wasn't worried about Zoro. The journalists had jumped at the revival of the Straw-Hat Pirates like vultures on dead meat. The whole world knew that the Straw-Hats were back in business. But he had no idea where Perona was. She had told him she would search for Moria, though, but Mihawk didn't like the idea. As one of the seven Schichibukai_ _, he would have known if Moria had been back. After all, the World Government had declared him as officially dead, after the war at Marineford. But the swordsman knew it wasn't true. He had seen him run and he had told Perona exactly this. While she had been very happy about the fact, Mihawk, on the other hand, hadn't really cared. But now, after these two years, he didn't like the idea of Perona being with Moria. She didn't belong with him._

_Again, Mihawk's gaze spotted the calendar. Determined to take it down, he reached for it. He wanted to stop counting the days that his two guests were away by now. It were too many, and it bothered him that it bothered him to be alone._

_But the moment he had the smooth paper between his fingers his determination vanished again. As yesterday and the day before yesterday and the days before that, Mihawk couldn't get himself to take the calendar down and throw it into the flames._

_Perona had given them the calendar as a Christmas present during their final holiday, to make sure Zoro wouldn't be late. She had neatly circled the date the Straw-Hat had landed on Kuraigana and therefore needed to be back on Sabaody Archipelago. After that, she had noted down their three birthdays, in her slightly curved handwriting, even though neither hers nor Zoros birthday would take place during the time they both were still on his island._ _  
_

“ _So you won't forget when you have to buy presents,” she had said. What a stupid girl. What had she been thinking?_

_Lost in thought, Mihawk stared at the calendar, and minutes after minutes passed. He was so lost in the question what kind of present would suit the ghost girl, whose birthday would happen to take place in a few weeks’ time, if she was here, that he only recognized the presence behind him after some moments. Slowly, he turned around, to face her, because he could barely believe it. For a second, he had the thought he may have brought her here only by wishful thinking, but he knew it was stupidity. Nonetheless, she was here. In front of him stood Perona._

_Actually, he wanted to be happy about her appearance. At least he should have been able to make an annoyed gesture, to shut her babbling off. But none of it happened, because the woman in front of him wasn't babbling. She didn't even say a word, not a sound emerged from her lips, which seemed unusually white._

_The sight shocked Mihawk. He never saw the girl like this before. She was stock-still, and all she did was looking at him out of empty eyes. Would she had have injuries, wounds, scratches, anything, he would have known how to handle it. He also would have known how to handle her if she had screamed. But what he saw here was a situation he had never had to handle before. Because Perona wasn't hurt. She was uninjured and still she seemed as she was dead. Her eyes were cold, her expression numb and her shoulders hung down loosely. In one of her hands dangled her umbrella, the other hold a big, frazzled teddybear, which she obviously had dragged behind her._

_Mihawk didn't know what to say. The sight of the girl shocked him to his core, even though he didn't show it on the outside. He was a master of hiding his feelings, but Perona's shattered appearance put him to the test. Something in his blood started to boil._

_Minutes passed in protracted silence, before he heard a low and dry “Hello” out of Perona's mouth. She tried to form a smile, but it failed miserably. However, it freed Mihawk out of his freeze. With a simple gesture, he told her to sit down in an armchair. His look didn't allow any protest, and he didn't get any. While the ghost girl slowly started to move, Mihawk disappeared into the kitchen. There he got another wine glass and filled it with the crimson liquid. When he returned into the hall, Perona was sitting keenly on her chair, and he shoved the glass in her hand silently. He actually assumed objections, after all, it was wine he gave her here, but nothing was audible, therefore he stood in front of her and fixed his eyes with hers._

“ _What happened?”_

_He wanted to know which or who was responsible for Perona not being herself. He wanted to know it, so he could – if needed with force – undo it._

_For a long time the big, black eyes just stared into the crimson liquid, before she took a sip of the wine. The yellow hawk-eyes of the swordsman widened in disbelief. If it hadn't been obvious that something drastic happened to Perona, it was now. She didn't drink wine. Perona hated wine._

“ _I brought Zoro to Sabaody Archipelago and stayed there until the Straw-Hats left. It was a while we stayed. We had been faster than we thought. I didn't know he had a vivre card, which showed us the way. It was easier with it. But after a few days all of them arrived. They took off safely. Zoro was happy to see them all again. He really was happy… and after… I… I didn't know what to do with myself… alone … so I went back to Thriller Bark. I thought… I wanted… to search… Moria...”_

_Perona's voice sounded monotonous, no feeling was audible, and Mihawk wasn't used to it from her. Normally she talked with enthusiasm. Some emotion was always in her tone, mostly annoyance, but in these two years, he had heard several different ones. But this… It was added up that she had visible problems to say the name of her former captain. She barely hadn't been able to utter the name Moria and it sounded agonized. By now, Mihawk could assume whose fault this situation was and he didn't like it. Fury filled his chest._

“ _However, the Thriller Bark was broken. No one had been able to repair the ship after the fight with the Straw-Hats. It was barely one around. But I found Bearsy instead ...”_

_She briefly held up her hand with which she gripped the teddy bear and dropped it, lifeless, a short moment after it. So this was her beloved teddy, which she talked so much about. The stuffed animal, which he doubted had been a nice view in its normal condition, was torn open and covered with holes, stuffing coming out of it. Broken would be a shameless understatement._

“ _I thought, when no one's around, I just go. I wanted to go. But there had been someone there. I bumped… into… Moria. He attacked me… wanted to steal my shadow… wanted to take revenge on Luffy and the Straw-Hats… because they beat him… he stole the shadows from them all on Thriller Bark… from his own crew… from each it was possible to steal… but… I didn't let him take mine. I thought he's strong… I thought he's a great Warlord… but this small amount of Haki you showed me was enough. He didn't get me… but Bearsy… He…broke… it...”_

_Tears streaked down the ghost-girl's cheeks and dropped continuously on her striped dress. Her voice, which had been low altogether, broke away by now and the wine glass shook in her hand. When it was on the verge of dropping, Mihawk plucked it out of her grip and put it on a small side table. His gaze fell upon the stuffed animal, which lay on the ground next to the armchair and was held tightly by Perona. Fixing it would be impossible, as much he was aware of._

_Privately, though, Mihawk knew, it wasn't the torn teddy bear which upset Perona like that. It was Moria. It was the warlord and his actions, which the former crewmember hadn't thought of her old captain. Although Mihawk had always known Moria was a lousy bastard._

_Perona had adored Moria by the time she had come to Kuraigana, Mihawk was aware of it. How often had she called out that Master Moria was so much better. She had cursed, whined and complained she wanted to get back to Thriller Bark. He still knew how happy she had been when he had told her he didn't believe in Moria's death. Now he had betrayed her bitterly._

_Rage burned through his veins. Hot, fiery rage that Mihawk had long forgotten. He remembered why he never could stand the bat, and he knew Moria wouldn't get out of their next meeting alive._

“ _Mihawk...”_

_He pricked up his ear when he heard her whispering his name. He still hadn't said anything, his emotions engrossed him too much. Additionally, he was sure he wasn't the right person to comfort someone. He never did it before and he wasn't aware how it worked. But he looked at her._

_Her eyes were swollen, her lips quivering and her hand cramped around the teddy bear. Her tears, though, had stopped and his look told her to go on speaking._

“ _...Do you think… Do you believe… Can I stay? I mean… I don't know where else to go. I don't want to go back to Thriller Bark… and there isn't anywhere else… I promise I'm quiet and won't annoy you. Do you think if I'm quiet, I can…”_

“ _No!”_

_The word whizzed through the air and cut off the girl's sentence. Shocked, her eyes widened, before he saw Perona gulp and try to stand up. Her face showed misery. She wanted to go, but Mihawk didn't let her. Fast as lightning, he stood in front of her armchair and pushed her back into the soft filling. His yellow eyes sparkled dangerously._

“ _Since when are you asking for permission if you can stay? Since when are you voluntarily low and quiet? You lived here for two years and you didn't care an inch if I wanted you staying here or not. You had been loud and impolite and an annoying, little brat.”_

_Perona gulped fearful, while his eyes locked hers._

“ _Don't you dare change anything about it now. Don't you dare be someone else. You're my ghost girl and Moria will pay for what he did to you!”_

_She stared at him and until his words made it into her mind at least two minutes had passed. He still leaned towards to her, and slowly, life went back into her eyes. A small smile was visible on her face, which grew bigger and bigger. After a while, she nearly grinned._

“ _You didn't have to shout at me like this. Besides, what is that with this wine? You I don't like wine. That's disgusting. How can you drink something like it?”_

_When he heard her usual, annoyed voice, he pushed himself back into a standing position. A silent sigh escaped his lips. This was what he could handle. This was how he wanted Perona to be and not different._

_The moment he wanted to turn, though, a hand gripped and stopped him from doing so. Black eyes met his yellow ones and in them, he could read deep solidarity._

“ _Mihawk… Thank you!”_

_For a short moment, the swordsman didn't know how to handle those words. Warmth radiated through his chest. He couldn't place it. Then he grabbed that small wrist and pulled the pink haired girl into a standing position as well. Now she was standing in front of him and looked at him questioningly. But he let go of her, got his sword, which leaned against an armchair and placed it on his back._

“ _According to the marines, Moria is already dead. I don't think they're mad at me if I make it come true. You just have to tell me where he is. No one… no one makes my ghost girl cry unpunished._

* * *

Boldly, Mihawk heaved the bear cub off his shoulder and put it back on the ground. Meanwhile, he had gotten back his hat and flipped it with a swift movement back onto its rightful place, before he examined Perona, who played happily with the other animal. A small grin played over his lips at the sight, but when the gaze of the girl hit him, there was only his grumpy face visible. After all, he didn't want to give her any reason to think he supported her ambitions. Her look was pleading, and he knew exactly what would come.

“Can I keep them?”

Gracefully, he stood up and raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

“You won't listen anyway if I say no.”

As a confirmation for his words, a grin followed them. Mischievously smiling, she looked at him. He had known it, and a sigh she couldn't miss was audible.

“I'm not saving you when the mother bear attacks.”

Offended, Perona let go of the cub and pouted. Not that he had ever saved her from a bear, she was able to manage that on her own very well. But he knew he was wrong. She was aware of it, too, because he could see in her eyes how she thought about the fight with Moria a few months ago. He had paid back each tear she had cried. This girl messed up his whole life. Her following word just confirmed it.

“Liar.”

But Mihawk just laughed. She could mess up his life all she wanted to. It was better with than without her.

“Let’s go home, ghost girl.”

 


End file.
